Life on Half Pint Farm by Mr. Diddy: RAYBO

Hello Folks!

Diddy, Here.

Been enjoying a spot of tea with me Mum and Pops...

Haven't been sleeping well lately...

Today I'd like to discuss with you something that troubles me nearly every day, even keeping me up at night.

RAYBO!

This is Raybo...

Now, Raybo is a metal rooster. Strange, right?

What makes Raybo weird, you ask?

Well, nearly every day, Raybo is somewhere different in the house. Now, I would like to blame Jane or Kahn on this ludicrous behavior, but... THEY DON'T HAVE THUMBS!!!
I also know it isn't Pops, Mum, or the Teenager. At night, when we all go to sleep, I position myself so that I can keep a lookout for everyone if needed. (This goes back to me days on the grand old SCS, serving the Queen and assisting British SAS, MI5, and MI6, but those are stories best told in another report!) If Mum, Pops, or the Teenager were to awaken to sneak downstairs to fetch Raybo and clandestinely move him about in some sort of twisted ploy of trickery, I'd know about it. WHICH IS WHY THIS IS ALL THE MORE STRANGE!

Let me illustrate:

Here is Raybo enjoying a near empty cup of coffee on the butcher block. The photo doesn't do justice for the moment caught, but if it did it would betray dripping coffee from Raybo's beak!

How is this even possible? He's metal. He doesn't have a heartbeat. Strange...

Here I caught Raybo on the floor below the butcher block. This photo was taken minutes after the one with the coffee. He's making his way to go somewhere else. Yet, you never actually see him move. He just appears somewhere different. This really freaks me out.

Raybo on the stove inspecting the pot of chili.

This is another thing that Raybo does that absolutely annoys me. He likes to occupy spaces that I usually enjoy.

Yes. This is meself, in the very place that Mr. Tinbird likes to hang out sometimes. Often, I move on to another of me favorite spots, only to find him one step ahead of me!

This house is big enough that he can find some other place to be! OR... maybe this house isn't big enough for the both of us. I may have to have me a showdown at sunset with this freak of metallic handiwork.

It really is strange to wake up from a nap to find Raybo eyeballing you, as exhibited here by Dr. Kahn.

Now this is interesting. Raybo is studying Jane. Hmmm. Raybo and I may have something in common after all. However, I am reserving any positive judgment on this seemingly animated piece of left over street sign turned home décor.

Remember this pic, folks? Check out the next two.

Is there no justice with this thing?

Okay, now I downloaded this off of security cams. I'm really not happy to wake up from a nap and find that strange thing staring at me. It gives me the willies!

Now there may be some confusion out there amongst me avid following. But hang in there fans!

I'm going to take everyone through a little exercise on how to tell a metal chicken from a real one.

Raybo, the metal chicken.

Gertie, a real chicken.

Raybo

Rose, a real chicken.

Raybo

Penelope, a real chicken

Raybo

Beulah, a real chicken.

Now things are getting out of hand around the world... and I thought I ought to write this blog entry to warn people all over the world. Me mum and me went shopping, and I about did backflips when I saw this vile product sitting on the display shelves of one of the local stores. Mum tells me that she has seen them everywhere. It's like "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" has come to life!

. As seen in the photo above, here is a despicable creature. RAYBO HAS A COUSIN!

Just when I think I have Raybo cornered, so that I can alert Mum or Pops, Raybo suddenly appears back on top of the toaster oven where he spends most of his day (when Mum, Pops, or the teenager are around). Very tacky, if you ask me!

By the way, I had a little fun with this photo... Raybo can't do anything about it... I have a cord appearing to hang out of his backside! he he he.

Well, I've pled my case. Judge for yourself. Raybo- Work of Art, Or Secret Diabolical Machine?

Enough of Raybo. It's kinda embarrassing that I have let him occupy so much space on me blog. I really thought the whole world should know about these things, before they take over.

Change of subject matter. During another shopping trip, I picked up a coffee mug the likes of which I presented to Dr. Kahn upon my return to our humble abode.